Illuminations in the Key of Dark

Seek out the Light in this place, for it will bring awareness in the most Darkest of times.

May these pages be a collection of Light's Redemptive whisper, whether from inspiration, music, art or laughter, to this little corner of the World.

Start:

Yesterday a close relative of my family passed away from a heart attack.
He was a doctor, which makes it interesting to think about.

He passed away suddenly, in the hospital, and my Mom felt extremely sad and wished she could have been there with her family to console each other.

It was the end of his life, from one minute to the next. He was there, in his eyes, and then, he’s not.
One things has ended to start another.

I must confess that I am truly afraid to die. For many reasons, as you may conjure up yourself when you ask yourself the question of death. However, I think it terrifies me the most when I think of such finality. Such departure. Such space in between.

But then I think of that beautiful human being that my Mom loved so dearly, whom she wished to see again soon before she found out of his death. I think of how we weren’t meant to experience such pain and I think of how it is made whole by Grace and Mercy and Love.

And the fear subsides a little because when one ends, the other begins.

I’m here. I love you. I don’t care if you need to stay up crying all night long, I will stay with you. There’s nothing you can ever do to lose my love. I will protect you until you die, and after your death I will still protect you. I am stronger than Depression and I am braver than Loneliness and nothing will ever exhaust me.
 Elizabeth Gilbert  (via bornreadygeneration)

Getting sick is bad enough.

It doesn’t help that it makes the vulnerability in me sky-rocket. 

What makes us want to be close to someone when we are most needing to rest our bodies and minds?

I just pray I that God fills that void, rather than me. 

When the people saw the thunder and lightning and heard the trumpet and saw the mountain in smoke, they trembled with fear. They stayed at a distance and said to Moses, “Speak to us yourself and we will listen. But do not have God speak to us or we will die.” 
Moses said to the people, “Do not be afraid. God has come to test you, so that the fear of God will be with you to keep you from sinning.” 

The people remained at a distance, while Moses approached the thick darkness where God was. 
Exodus 20:18-21

Sometimes, we just have to run towards the darkness. View high resolution

When the people saw the thunder and lightning and heard the trumpet and saw the mountain in smoke, they trembled with fear. They stayed at a distance and said to Moses, “Speak to us yourself and we will listen. But do not have God speak to us or we will die.” 

Moses said to the people, “Do not be afraid. God has come to test you, so that the fear of God will be with you to keep you from sinning.” 

The people remained at a distance, while Moses approached the thick darkness where God was. 

Exodus 20:18-21

Sometimes, we just have to run towards the darkness.

No, detachment is not enough; we must go on to attachment.
The detachment from the confusion all around us is in order to have a richer attachment to God.
Christian meditation leads us to the inner wholeness necessary to give ourselves to God freely.
— Richard Foster, Celebration of Discipline

Blessed is the man

who makes the Lord his trust,

who does not turn to the proud,

to those who go astray after a lie!

A reminder to myself that these splinters I get for going against the grain are truly going to heal.

Hearing that you are not the crazy one or the one to blame can be the biggest relief.

Because sweetheart, you are not crazy, at fault, or guilty of anything that has been done to you. No matter your past, your present, or where you think you’ll be. 

Here’s to waiting on God for His peace, even if we have to sit through tears, pain, loneliness and heartache. His timeline is not like ours. 

And here’s to speaking about it. 

For those in pain and in confusion, like me. 

Insecure

Even when bad things happen to us or we feel like the world is spinning out of control, we could trust that God is able to use everything for His glory and our good. It’s when we doubt God that worries creep in and we are tempted to chase after another source of help. But God alone is our only source of true rest. He is the Creator and Sustainer of the Universe. He tells us, “Behold, I am the LORD, the God of all flesh. Is anything too hard for me?” (Jeremiah 32:27). When we look to Him—if we really trust Him—how can we be worried about anything? Besides, those other things we put our hope in offer no real security.

A Promise

You who have made me see many troubles and calamities 
   will revive me again; 
from the depths of the earth 
   you will bring me up again. 
You will increase my greatness 
   and comfort me again.

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